Disaster Mysteries
and Disasters Known:
The Big Difference
We are sadly caught in a silent movie. Not just any movie, it’s a really silent, horror movie. It comes complete with a religious twist too! Something about a rosary, the blessed mysteries and, for the suspense-action part of it, bang! A calamity!!!
Calling the attention of Hon. Gilbert Teodoro and his uncle, Mr. Eduardo Danding Cojuangco: running the defense juggernaut of this country is not merely about working on selective potentials. Calling on your consciences. Calling on the Hon. Leandro Mendoza, Rey Berroya, Guiling Mamondiong, Lenlen Bautista: running the transportation and communications concern of the country is a serious business. Pray tell, when heads will start rolling.
There appears to be a very wide gaping chasm between the events that caused the present plight of the MV Princess of the Stars, the smaller sea vessels that sank in the wake of Typhoon Frank, the victims of the tropical storm in the regions and even in the capital region, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera and our cumulative available information and knowledge about disaster, calamity, natural occurrences, environmental flashpoints.
People, look once, twice, thrice and quar… WTF! at the National Disaster Coordinating Council (NDCC) — the only agency in the world as they say that makes disasters work properly — website. What are they saying?
For instance, the Tsunami Hazard maps of the country — repeat — the country, Republic of the Philippines — is graphically represented only by Infanta, Real, Nakar (also known as REINA).
In the Earthquake Hazard maps again only the REINA is shown.
And so forth, and so on. Then we visit the Phivolcs. It shows its own hazard maps in horrendously minute images, in very, very small pixels, that if you expand them, they blot, scatter, blow, whathaveyou.
Possibly, even a simple Philippine Map by the Phivolcs, will literally kill you with apoplexy. Why do they have to show us these things? These are an insult to our small intelligence. To think that both Department of National (It) Depens, and the Phi(bble)(Jo)kes, are paying supposedly technically competent personages! OMG!
Look at the fault line drawn by Phi(bble)(Jo)kes in their so-called map! Shit!
You can see two parallel lines besides (the left and right) 7,000+ Philippine Islands and there is a teeny, weeny blurred line here and there inside the land masses that are also tiny tiny tiny!
To get a decent idea of where the fault lines run, you still have to go to far-away sites like the USGS, the Carleton College online encyclopedia site, while the site of NDCC will leave you breathless, with anger and a sudden illness.
Now comes the greatest of them all: Tessie Tomas’ favorite lampoon topic, FAG- ASS- AH A!!!
The Philippine Atmospheric, Geophysical and Astronomical Services Administration. In its page, about what they intelligently call PSWS, you are treated to a series of drawings of Pre-School, Kindergarten or at its best, Grade 1 simplicity. You can really understand the assholes as if they are conversing with you in plain fucking baby talk. Bull fucking shit! But wait!
The daring heading of the page is Modified Philippine Public Storm Warning Signals.
The FAG ASS AH A proceeds to explain in simple, farmerly, peasantly, fisherfolkly, urban poorly terms what the twigs and branches do when a typhoon blows over their little asses. Then they have this quaint little home page. Again, like Phi(bble)(Jo)kes, there is that teeny, tiny, weeny map (connected to brain dwarfism or mental nanism) syndrome again.
Now, people, ladies and gentlemen, relatives, friends, and lovers, this is not a joking blog post.
This is serious business. Why do we have these holy mysteries being perpetrated by DND, NDCC, OCD (Office of Civil [It] Depens), DOTC, DOST, PHIVOLCS, PAG-ASA and all their fucking allied agencies?
Why not help us all be informed properly about disasters waiting to erupt in our midsts?
For instance, is it a shame to admit that Rey Punongbayan took the super secret of the Marikina – University of the Philippines at Diliman – Pasig internal earthquake fault line to his grave?
Imagine the United Nations or World Bank funding that fucking research just to flush out the fault lines in the Philippines and all we are being given is a fucking teeny, tiny, weeny shamefully small pixeled image of the earthquake hazard map of the country that cannot even be used decently in any presentation!
On the part of the DND, NDCC, OCD, DOTC, they have all the great maps in their possession.
They do not need to show the intelligence secrets in some of the maps they prepare! Damnit!!!
All they need to show, are maps that the NAMRIA, DND-AFP and DOTC-PCG already have that could be usable for public consumption and these are easily digitized by passing them over a flatbed scanner, about the size of a coffin. Hopefully, their own coffin as well. Nothing really needs to be compromised! You shits, you!!!
And the PAG-ASA, what Modified fucking bull is it talking about? We are far from having a real localized, much more national public warning system for storms and whatever. What modified are they talking about?
And the Department of Environment and Natural Resources — DENR under Sec. Jose Atienza is doing no better. Do we have an environmental hazard map? DENR through NAMRIA has been spending a lot for Geographic Information Systems along with the Land Registration Authority or LRA. Do we have a decent hazard map of potential nature flashpoints? With the global warming plague coming, is DENR properly addressing the threats?
It is the National Science Week for (f_g) christ’s sake! Are there going to be no policy statements that will be made about our bline ness and blayt? God almighty!!! And the bishops and priests are doing the political salsa, salsa, salsa but not moving the concerned to look after our real welfare!!! The Shits!!!
And look at the Protestants, led by chief justice! Susmaryosep!!! What are all these idiots doing?
No wonder, the Suspicious Lines was blaming, in the same breath, GOD, (daw) and PAGASA.
I would not mind putting the blame on PAGASA for the oil price hike, the collapsation and near drowning of Joe Perez a/k/a Joe De Venecia in the muddy canals of Qatar, the kidnapping and carnal re awakening of Ces Drilon, Homobono Adaza arrest, the foiled attempt of the Adaza-Fortun-Mapalo-Cardeño-Amboy-Peña gang to assassinate the Filipino partners of the japon client of Fortun to blame the japon and make him vomit a happily tremendous load of shit dirty money, the kuno-kuno kudeta so the arrest and detention will justifiably be inane and inadequate, the earthquake in china, the terrorism against the Beijing Olympics by the Tibetans, etcetera, etcetera, the emerging dementia of the chief justice of the supreme court, and so many other things so pervading in the air.
And DOST, what in hell is it doing wallowing in total shitty surroundings and working conditions in Bicutan, Taguig and not requesting for better funding and better facilities and not writing project proposals for grants to people like Filipino Fr. Dan Ceballos in Europe (can be contacted through the Catholic Church and the Catholic communications center in Sta. Mesa), who could push huge, enormous amounts of money in foreign currencies to build laboratories, buy equipment, materials, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. For fucking love of god! DOST cannot even buy a decent electric fan in its ground floor laboratory! No wonder it cannot dish out good technologies because barely little of its money goes into decent spending. It can’t even print a decent map of the Philippines and its earthquake faults and this Brazilian nincompoop’s warning about a July 18,2008 disaster keeps everyone awake, alive, dreamy, suddenly bereft and deprived of morning and evening sex, frustrated about the missing first million, angst-ridden, suffering from ear pain, tooth ache, stomach cramps, back aches, arthritis, gout, high blood, murmuring heart, syphilis, gonorrhea, AIDS, HIV, SARS, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. Susmaryosep! Susmaryosep … Talaga!!! Tanga!!!
So we are a people meandering in abject darkness, divested of our supreme natural right to be informed citizens of the Republic, our Chief Justice is traipsing all around about EJK, EJK, EJK kuno, susmaryosep!!! And we will all be swept by the genocide of nature in magnitude greater than suspicious lines’ murderings and mass assassination, as DOST jet-setting wannabes are schlepping all over the globe and hopping from one fancy hotel and restaurant to another in the guise of Technology Quest, Technology Coordination, Technology Research, Technology Design, Technology Development, Scientific Endeavors, and all that ersatz! And all we get to be shown are small pixels of pictures that are put to total and absolute shame by the sleazy FHM Magazine of the Gokongweis!!!
Por dios por santo!!!
Totally, an unwonderful world, pardon the pun Mr. James Morrison.
In the next nine to ten days prior to July 18, if the Brazilian crazy’s earthshaking predictions will prove to be right after all, what are we to do? We shall lie in languor and await our dire fortunes. The Corinthian Gardeners will humbly exercise their patience to lead themselves to their own extinction, and we will fall after them if they grasp our toes, hair, edge of our shirts, pants, skirts, socks, shoes, boots, fingers, panties, bras, tampons, condoms, IUDs, noses, ears, mouths, penises, pubic hairs, vaginas, rectums, eyes, or in a really authentic disaster’s milieu, as favoredly announced by media always, if the Corinthian Gardeners happen to hold on to our or a portion of intestines, livers, nerves, muscles, pelvises, spinal columns, bones …
Whatever.
Ewwwwe!!!!
D’ SELECT RESPONSE, MERIT
AND AWARD, CITATION OF
THE PIPOL AND D’ NATION:
LON RENDYER: Hoy! Mga kinauukulan, magsikilos na kayoooo!!!
ANTI-LUSLUS: Haaay iNaku, dioskupu! hindi talaga ako pinatulog nitong pekeng sahy kick na ito na bagum bago – jucelino nobrega da luslos. Ala laging pambili ng gamot sa kanyang nahuhulog na itlog, kaya pala nanggigising ng ibang tao kasi siya rin hindi talaga maka sleep sa kanyang kaluslos luslos na kalagayan. Kawawa naman din pala, gusto sana talaga siyang tulungan. Papaliguan ko ng kumukulong mantika para maluto ang kanyang hulog hulog na itlog.
TOTUT: Kaya lihim nilang gaganapin ang National Science and Technology Week (NSTW kuno) at si pangulong gma, mag i spit na nakataklob ang katawan para nakatago at di nakikita at gagawin ang Asean Science and Technology Week (ASS TW) na lahat ng poreyner naka talukbong din ang mukha para di mahalata na nakikisama silang sikretong nagpupugay sa mga sira ulong pinoy na takot sa pagbubulag sa kanilang mga kababayan.
Q: Assholes DOST, DOTC, PAGASA, DND, DENR, GMA!!!
KUTKOT: Kaya pala tayo nag re ak sa Da Luz, eh binubulag pala tayo nila TODORO of De-ND, si ESTILA BALBASTRO de Balatubas of DOST, !
RR: What happens to official time and the people’s taxes there you brujos, brujas, impactas, impactos!!! Shit! You f_g csheeet all of you!!! Exactly, what are you people trying to prove by leaving the entire Philippine population and some leery foreign visitors into your site blind?
DEDE: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat????!*$&^%)$#
FF: Are you insane or are you insane? Are all of you demented or are all of you incapacitated? In that sense, there is no need for you to keep getting your salaries!!! No need for the suffering public to be subsidizing your whims and caprices you lechers, you!!! Shit!!!
SS: Dios mio, perdona mi! Diyos ko pooo! Bakit ninyo kami pinagkaitan ng matitinong tao sa gobyerno!!!!!!!! Napaka demonyo ninyooooo!!!!
JACK ALL: Hoy! Mga buwisit na demonyo, carajo, bastardos kayo, aba’y tigilan niyo ngang paglololokohin kami haa!!! Ano’ng modipay monay public stom stom kayo dyan?
VOY VAYYOTTE: Me? I could really modify, totally make over the faces and asses of these assholes! Tyyyyype!
SIM MOURA: Palibhasa ang gagagago ninyo, pati kami isasali ninyo sa mga pisikal ninyong mga ugnayan — lantad man o tago, at hot mo s per(a)ic ninyong pangungulimbat at astronomiko ninyong pangangailangan at ambisyun at kahambugan!!! Mga diyaskeng kabayo kayo!!! Damuhong walang kabuti-buting asal, pwee!!!! Letse kayo para kayong walang mga nanay, mga damonyo kayong maiitim ang kaluluwa!!! Mag sa impiyerno na kayoooo!!!
MOTHERHOOD: Walang hiyaaaa!!! Bastos!!! Caramba!!! Carajo!!! Ijo de puta!!! Ija de Diablo!!!
SEGS: Hoy!!! Kayo!!! Mga gago, tarantado!!! Buwang buwang!!! Mamatay na sana kayong lahat putaaaa!!!!
T: Secretary ng DOST, putang ina ka! Hindi ba kayo nahihiya? Ninanakaw niyo ba ang salapi ng departamento? Papatayin kitaaa!!!!!
H: In the late 1990s, Sec. Gloria invited me to meet with him in his own office, at the Office of the Secretary of the DOST. His own computer in his room was moldy and super antique and its program when everyone was using state of the art processing software, was Wordstar. Fucking DOST!!! Unbelievable!!! Unbelievable!!!
Girbaudz: Amen, fucking Shit, to that!
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